"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Boys To Men

Well I hope you all had a wonderful Mother's Day. Mine was better than I could have imagined. My kids and my Sweetie did everything they could to make it a perfect day. I was served a delicious breakfast, Justin did an amazing job making me look good in his talk for Sacrament Meeting, and Loni's talk in primary was darling. We had bar-b-qued ribs for dinner and then roasted marshmallows in our newly dug fire pit that evening. How did I ever get so lucky? Hmmm was it luck?

Let's go back a couple years. It was right around Christmas time. My sister Erin was up for the weekend and heard my oldest son Jordan ask me what I wanted for Christmas. I quickly responded that I didn't need anything and he should save his money for something more important. The same answer I had been giving for every occasion that involved gift giving for years. Well Erin quickly let me know that she thought I was making a big mistake. She reminded me that I was preparing my 4 boys to one day be husbands and fathers. She believed that their future wives would not be pleased with spouses who were trained in this way. And of course she was right!

I guess I remember being young and wandering all over a store with no idea what to give my mom or dad. Of course I knew they were fine with anything. I still worried. And so I thought I was saving my kids from the stress. But my eyes were opened.

So, what to do? I wanted gift giving to be fun and positive. I wanted my boys to feel successful and excited with their choices. Here is what has worked for me.

A few weeks in advance I start dropping reminders of the upcoming occasion. For example, "Can you believe my birthday is in 3 weeks?". Then I make a list of things I want and need. I am still pretty easy to please and my lists usually consist of pretty simple things.

Now you might think that knowing everything you are going to get doesn't sound like any fun at all. But it sure has worked for us. On Mother's Day morning my kids, even the big and tough ones, couldn't wait for me to open their gifts. It was awesome!

Here was my Mother's Day wish list:

a book
body wash
flip flops
ankle socks
lip gloss with spf 15
a wallet

Guess what?? I got it all. But I never imagined that Loni would paint me picture and pick out sunglasses as cool as these.

Or that Jordan would have picked out (all on his own) this book.

Justin bought me this cool black wallet and threw in TWO-1 1/2 lb bags of Reese's Pieces (my all time fav. treat). I also got enough socks that I can wear a new pair every day for just over two weeks. Heavenly!!! Jalen got me body wash AND a new pouf. Yippie! From Johnny I got a great picture of him, a fabulous letter and a cute pair of black flip flop. (my flip flops are always black)

Everything I wanted and more. So, I am proud to say mission accomplished. I think my boys are heading in the right direction. Thank you Erin.


Marie said...

What a lovely day you had! Wonderful pictures as well. I was really pleased that for the first time in about 5 years I actually got a message from each one of my five children! That was a bonus. And yes, I do have a great recipe for a strawberry rhubarb pie. Look for it soon!

Are You Serious! said...

♡ That is SOOOO true! I never thought about that either!!! I'm definately remembering that for when Lane is older!!! :)

What a fabulous Mother's Day! :)

hoLLy said...

looks like you got spoiled! mission accomplished! thats whats supposed to happen on mother's day-we deserve, it darn it! :) i think its great that your sister gave you that idea to teach your boys how to be men to their wives someday. i'll have to remember that for when we finally have a son!

Danielle Christiansen said...

That is fantastic!!! I will have to remember that. i am the same way...I don't need anything etc. But I see how that can be stressful to kids.
Looks like you got great gifts and I love your haircut!!

Dancin Queen said...

That's a great idea--train them early!!

Heather said...

Erin always has good advice! Looks like a fabulous day for you!

Misty said...

CUTE pictures. And I always wear black or brown flip flops as well!

Grammy Staffy said...

I'm so glad that the kids and Dathan took good care of you. You truly do deserve it. I think that you are wonderful and I'm not a bit bias! I love you lots and I can't wait to see you Fri.

(Pray for us Thurs. night. I'm a bit worried about Dad driving to Virgin River after we leave the temple. He is not used to driving late at night any more...but we really want to be there to see Loni dance on Fri.)

Tricia said...

Wow Lynell, I know your kids are awesome and talented, but they really love their mom, too! What a great blessing that is. Makes all the hard work and thankless jobs easier, huh?

Lisa Cannon said...

It looks like you had a wonderful Mother's Day. Your kids did a great job of spoiling you!!! I agree with your friend, train them early. Their wives will appreciate it very much!!!

scrap chair potato said...

What a little smartie Erin is! I will have to do that with my boys
I LOVE Loni's painting, it is beautiful!
I am glad you had a great day. :)

An Ordinary Mom said...

I don't like to receive much for special days, especially when money is tight, but I had NEVER thought about training our little boys to be thoughtful spouses later on in life. Hmmm, I will have to think about this one :) !!

Happy Belated Mother's Day!

KATE said...

What a great idea! It's so true, and your future daughter in laws will appreciate all your "training"!
I'm so glad you had such a great Mothers Day!

Jill said...

I just read the post that your house is For Sale!!! Where are you headed? Y'all have lived in that neighborhood forever. I'm sure everyone will miss you like crazy!!

Jill said...

I just read the post that your house is For Sale!!! Where are you headed? Y'all have lived in that neighborhood forever. I'm sure everyone will miss you like crazy!!

Kelsi said...

I loved this post! You are such a cute Mom! I love the idea to have a list of the things you need! I know the feeling of wondering what to get my Mom! I love this idea and will be making my wish list for the next holiday! Take care!

Wendi said...

Thanks for sharing... I too always say, " I do not need anything...save your money!"
What an injustice I am doing them. I had not thought of it like that before. Thank your sister for me!

Danielle Christiansen said...

HI Lynell, me again to awnser your question, Condition after not before.

Corey and Susie said...

So true...my parents are so stubborn when it comes to gift ideas. I'm going to get them something anyways, I'd rather it be something they want right?? I'm so glad you do this...it's a great idea, and Im sure your kids appreciate it too!

Melisa said...

What a great idea you dont want your daughter in-laws to blame you if their husbands are clueless.

Steve said...

Hi Lynell
This is Lisa - I finally switched the comments on the blog. Hopefully people can leave comments on it now. (Steve's parents were a little nervous when we started the blog!) We miss Syracuse & the malls & the food & etc. There isn't even a Wendy's in this town! We LOVE the country life though!

Adorable blog & cute pictures! The kids love it up here, but also miss their friends & ward down there! Glad you had a super-fine Mother's Day! Now we need to prepare for the Father's Day that never ends!!! (Steve always milks it from the moment he opens his eyes till he closes his eyes!) Lisa

Lara said...

I LOVE this quote: "In my ninety-plus years, I have learned a secret. I have learned that when good men and good women face challenges with optimism, things will always work out! Truly, things always work out!"
~ President Gordon B. Hinckley

Cute blog- and what a loving family!

My Goodness said...

How wonderful! :)
The kids did great...and YES...you are training them right!!

My Ice Cream Diary said...

Wow, you totally scored this year. And you totally deserved it. It sounds like you have great kids, a fabulous husband, and have taught them how to properly treat a mother. There is nothing like feeling loved to put a smile on one's face. =)

The Sweet Escape said...

You know what goes great with Reece's Piece's? Popcorn! MMmmm!! Glad you had a fantastic Mother's Day!

april hickman said...

That post is so true. Your friend was totally right, she is making me think differently. I'm always saying things like " I don't need anything". But one thing I DON'T need for sure is another mundane day. I think it's cute because they made your day special!!!
By the way, I'm Kelsi's friend and I love your blog.

Erin said...

You have great kids! You are training those 4 boys of yours to be fantastic husbands one day.

What a wonderful day! Goodness, sometimes I'm afraid that I'm too much of blabber mouth... I'm glad it was helpful this time, smile!

Love you sis, it was sure fun to see you today!

Cecily R said...

You are so SMART! This is most certainly a lesson I need. I am so guilty of blowing off inquiries about presents. Well no longer! I vow to be cool and smart like Lynell!! :)

P.S. Sorry I am so behind. And that I haven't even responded to your last e-mail. I am so scattered lately! I LOVE that we have a connection. We are SURE to meet someday now!!